another human came between
and we're still that pack of lies
you know it
you know me
ridiculous or unreasonable
you made me
i could be fine
perfect even
but u pushed me round the corners
u drove me up the wall
u pushed the limits
and that explains why i'm what i am now
i'm no longer a who
cos i don't even know me

i may be demanding and domineering
but haven't you known this part of me already before you had feelings?
if you could like me cos i'm this
then why can't u accept that i'm this after falling for me?
i figured i think too much
but what else can i do?
when my mind churns and works so hard
just to find the answer i never could
in suspense, hell yes!
kinda got used to it
until u touched my soft spot and left me crumbling
was it ever your fault?
cos from the vaguest memory, it'd always been mine
entirely...
for the many times you humiliated me
for the many times you insulted me
for the many times i went crazy cos of all the shit u do
ultimately, i just go numb
indulgence in cheap thrills just to numb even the teeny weeny tingles
i had to
fags, alcohol...
i asked myself why so cheap
no answer
i asked God
He showed me light so bright i shut off

u said i've changed
i dare not deny
u made me take an oath
i did, with fingers crossed from behind
we came this far i agree
but the future seems bleak
what lies ahead i do not know nor do i have the courage to think
all i know is
i've changed
u've changed
it'll never be the same before
no matter how much we try to salvage it
i left it hanging
which raged u more
but honey, i don't know what i want anymore
so i just wanna stay put at where i am now
living each day as it is
cos to me, this is the best way i can delude myself and everyone around me
that everything's alright
and that the smile u see
is what you get.

saying this much
do u fathom?

You're the fire which burns my senses away